Dec 28, 2009

Grace in Small Things #42

1. Our new Wii Fit. It is making exercise fun, and I am proud to say, I am already a Yoga master and Hula Hoop champion!

2. Supper at Red Lobster tonight. Started out as a date night, but now it's a group of people. Ah well, should still be fun anyways.

Dec 22, 2009

Grace in Small Things #41

1. The Hawksley Workman tickets are here. Now I just have to track down Wench and pay for them.

2. Crying throughout "Glee".

3. Garlic bread.

4. Realizing that I shouldn't feel lonely, because I have Smyrish and the fur babies to keep me company.

5. Christmas shopping is done, and presents are wrapped.

Fuck Xmas, Yo.

Is it January 2nd yet? No? Motherfucker, I wish it was.

I think I have already had my annual Xmas mental breakdown, although I took it out on the dogs this time, instead of the handicapped people at work, who usually have to see me lose my mind, and sit on the floor crying and whining about how hard life is, and how I "just can't handle this shit anymore". Once the annual temper tantrum is over, I have a day of energy and productivity, and then I just go into auto-pilot until the holidays are over.

Christmas has never been my favorite time of year. I don't know what it is, but starting the week before, I am in a mood. I take everything a little bit too personally, everything is just a little too hard to deal with, and it takes all the inner strength I can muster up, just to get through until New Year's Day without killing myself or others. Usually, as soon as I know all the hullabaloo is over, I am calmer, happier, and am no longer having suicidal or murderous thoughts.

I don't know if it's the shopping, the pressure to make that one day the best day of the year for everyone around you, or the social and family commitments that I either can, or cannot attend, but it is all just too much. Sometimes I wish I was Jehovah's Witness or something, so I didn't have to deal.

Once Christmas Day is over, the stress of New Year's Eve is upon me. I never know what to do, where to go, who to hang out with. It always ends up being a fun party, no matter what I choose to do, but this year, it seems to be harder to make this decision, mostly because I feel like I am out of the loop with everyone I used to hang out with. I haven't hung out with the girls in so long, that I don't even know what or how they are doing, or what I would tell them if they asked me those questions. At the same time, I know I am not interested in braving the pub on a busy night like that, so I'm flip-flopping between house parties, trying to figure out where I would feel more comfortable, or welcome.

Blarg. Eleven more days, and all of this will be over, and I can concentrate on getting the hell away from here for a couple weeks. If Cuba works out nicely, and we decide to never come back, I'll get one of you to send the dogs to us, and the rest of our things you can divvy up amongst yourselves. :)

Dec 21, 2009

Happy Blogoversary To Me!

Sunday was my 6th annual blogoversary. To celebrate this wondrous occasion, I compiled a list of things you may or may not know about moi, or my blog, and then I went to Dougal's wake, got really drunk, and forgot to post it.

1. I first started making money off sewing when I was 15. I created a really cool patchwork floppy toque, and all the snowboarders in town went wild for them. Most of the boys in my grade bought one off me for $20.00 a piece. I wish I still had mine to show you.

2. The number of comments on blog posts that I get, has drastically decreased since I am no longer single, and have less depressing, or sordid things to write about. (Not that being single is a bad thing, it is just sometimes more interesting.) However, I am very happy that my life is no longer in a constant state of depression and chaos.

3. If I don't eat eggs in the morning, I feel like crap for the rest of the day. Since I rarely take time for breakfast, most days I feel like a big pile of shit.

4. My favorite thing to do with my dad, was go for a Sunday drive all over hells half acre, snooping through old abandoned farm houses and then checking out all the cars that were for sale in the area.

5. I have written my name in a closet of every place I have ever lived or worked, or spent any amount of time in that I deemed special. All "entries" are dated.

6. I know I am playing too much online Scrabble when I am dreaming about words and anagrams.

7. I have been to over 30 funerals. Actually, I stopped counting at 30, because goddamn, that's a depressing thing to keep track of.

8. If I could do whatever I wanted in life, I would live in a lake front cottage year round, work from home, fish and swim everyday and have Stella Artois always on hand.

9. All I want for Christmas is a maid.

10. The three most popular posts since I started have been "Just Girl Stuff" , "The Recent Adventures of Abigail, Part Two" and "90 Days" .

11. I do not believe in divorce, unless there is something absolutely tragic and abusive going on. That is why I never thought I would get married. I never wanted to put myself in a position where I would have to legally break-up with someone, over something trivial that just drove me nuts. Luckily, my husband feels the same way.

12. I put garlic and dill into almost anything I cook.

13. I can only fall asleep on the cool side of the pillow.

14. Even though I took French throughout elementary and high school, I only know a handful of words, and maybe 2 or 3 phrases.

15. There is a blizzard on my birthday every single year, and it is never warmer that -35C. Luckily, this year, I'll be in Cuba. With my luck, it'll snow.

16. I brush my teeth, or rinse with mouthwash, every single time I go to the bathroom.

17. I used to be addicted to flossing my teeth, but now I usually forget to do it.

18. There are so many things I would like to tell the readers of my blog, but because of some of the people who read it, I can't.

19. My favorite pizza is the steak and mushroom melt from Panago.

20. My favorite scents are vanilla, the air after a summer rain, dill and the smell of a boat starting up.

21. I would guess that 60% of each day I live, is dedicated to cleaning up feces between home and work.

22. I really hate pointy toed shoes. Maybe because they look ridiculous on me.

23. Although I am jealous of their weekends off, EDO's, holidays, etc., I could never in a million years work in an office. I like not having scheduled breaks, and the option to be outside whenever I want, and rarely do I have to be up in the morning.

24. I have always had a strange fashion sense. My mom has some funny stories about the outfits I used to pick out as a kid. I still stand by my decisions.

25. The age of twenty-five was so horrible for me, that I wouldn't wish twenty-five upon my worst enemy.

26. One of the worst books I have ever read was "a-A Novel" by Andy Warhol.

27. I am totally "Team Jacob". I understand why she liked Edward in the first place, but c'mon, by the second book, us adults should know in our hearts that he's trouble, and just likes her, because he can control her. I've been there. So fuck you Edward, and your shiny skin.

28. I cannot go to bed, without a glass of water at my side.

29. I really, truly hate the fact that everyone in the world is so addicted to their cell phones, IPhone, Blackberry's, etc. Put down your gadget, and pay attention to the world around you once in a while, it's a pretty neat place.

30. Cream of mushroom soup, is only good with a pile of crackers, and a pinch of pepper.

31. I love Micheal Jackson. He makes my booty shake like nobodies business.

32. I think New Year's Eve is highly over-rated.

33. If I could go back to any place I have ever travelled, I would choose Churchill, Manitoba, Scotland and Venice Beach.

34. Before I'm dead and gone, I want to travel to Costa Rica, Mexico, Australia, Spain and New York City.

35. I am really bad at keeping in touch with people.

36. My number one guilty pleasure would have to be reading trashy tabloid magazines.

37. Malls scare me.

38. I hate watching myself on video. I always look and sound like a freakin' idiot.

39. In a huge percentage of photos ever taken of me, I am sticking out my tongue. I can't help it though, if I see a camera pointed in my direction, it just happens. However, after looking at photos from my wedding, I can see that it is hereditary. Most of my cousins on my mom's side do the same thing.

40. Although I love my blog, and love writing in general, life just gets in the way sometimes, and I don't post regularly, or write fluff posts just to fill the space. I have promised myself, that 2010 will be a "good writing year".

Dec 18, 2009

Xmas Letters

Dear Maggie and Patches,

I love you both with all my heart, but you really need to pee on the training pads, not beside them. Also, I am looking into doggie rehab for your garbage addictions. I'll keep you posted.

Love, Mommy

Dear Co-worker Who Regularly Does Not Show Up for Shifts,

Last night, I had my car warming up, my boots on, and was ready to leave, as I had already been at work for ten hours. When I looked at the clock, and it was 12:10am, I knew you weren't coming. The least you could have done, was phone, or at least answer your phone when I called you.

Oh, and you're gonna be fired, so fuck you. Then I won't have to deal with your shit anymore.

Yours Truly, Your Boss


Dear Chick on her Cell Phone,

I hope next time you are texting and driving during rush hour, on icy streets, you crash into a light post. Sound harsh? Well, you almost crashed into me, and I'd rather I be alive than have you driving around yapping on your cell phone about the Jonas Brothers, or how so-an-so totally looked at your funny in class today.

Friends Forever, Abigail


Dear Smyrish,

If it wasn't for you, I'd go mad. Thank you for being at home today and letting me interrupt your work with kisses.

Love always, Your Wife

Dec 14, 2009


I never really thought about this whole H1N1 flu, or took it seriously at all, until today, when I found out that it killed a friend of mine.

To be honest, most of our pub crew never really knew Dougal all that well. He was the fat, funny guy, who liked his beer a bit too much. He said things that he probably shouldn't say at times, and made people wonder about him...but really, don't we all say and do things we shouldn't when we're drinking? I would say yes. If you don't agree, you are lying to yourself. At the same time though, for those of us who took the time to get to know him, knew that he was a big-hearted, genuine, all-around nice guy, who was just looking to fit in, and be loved.

Dougal and I were not super close, but we were friends nonetheless. We met at The Pub, on my 29th birthday. When Mr. Head introduced us, Dougal told me I was the prettiest birthday girl he had ever seen and kissed my hand. We ended up hanging out quite a bit over the next couple years, usually drinking beers and having a laugh. When we ran into each other, he always told me I was beautiful, that he was happy to see me, and I would blush. He would then tell me how great my husband was, and how lucky we were to have each other. He was one of the only people in the world, I actually believed when I was complimented.

Whether you knew it or not, if Dougal sat with you , talked to you, whatever, he liked you. If you were sad, he was sad with you, and if you were happy, he celebrated for you.

It really knocked me on my ass when I learned of his passing today. All I could think of was "But, he's my age." People our age aren't supposed to die yet. It's just not right. We're still kids..aren't we?

To quote a friend's Facebook status today: "R.I.P Dougal Ross, I hope wherever you are, the pints are cold and delicious." So, so long, Dougal. It was nice knowin' ya, and thanks for always making me feel special, for the bear hugs, and for making me laugh. The Pub just won't be the same without you.

For those who knew him: There will be no official funeral service, however Mr. Head has planned a wake, which will be held on Sunday, Dec. 20th @ 7pm, at O'Hanlon's.

Dec 11, 2009

Grace in Small Things #40

1. The smell of brown sugar.

2. My good friend, Wench.

3. Harry Potter books that are waiting to be read.

4. A day with no commitments.

Dec 10, 2009

Oh Jebus, Xmas is Coming

You can tell Christmas is coming, when everyone is stressed out, cranky and complaining about a lack of money.

I am trying to be all "zen" about Christmas this year. I have realized that there is no way in hell I can please everyone, and with the short amount of time I have off from work, I can't even really please myself, and do exactly what I wanted to do, which would be having at least a few days to see everyone, and go everywhere. From what I understand, that's just the way it goes, once you're a married adult who has a job.

This year I will not be able to go to Small Town for Christmas, and instead we will be going to Smyrish's dad's place on Christmas Day, and his mom's on Boxing Day, so we're still getting good meals, and time to visit relatives before I have to get back to work. We even get to throw a Boxing Day brunch in there with a couple friends who do not have family here, and for that, I am grateful. To me, my friends are family too. I am also grateful that I have a mother that understands that regular everyday life doesn't stop just because it's a holiday. She understands that I have to work, and that I only have a day and a half to do the Xmas thing, and we can always get together another time. It's too bad my brother GQ isn't as understanding, because it would make this year much easier on me. I've missed out on Christmas before due to work, weather or car troubles, and the world didn't end. It just sucks a little, not to be involved in the Christmas traditions we become so accustomed to, after years of doing those same things, and seeing the same people.

The first Christmas after my dad died, was when I learned that life changes, and things don't always stay the way you want them to stay. Christmas morning was strange and awkward for me, even though our routine didn't change much. He wasn't sitting on the couch in his robe, watching us as we opened our presents, giving us lame advice on what we should do with our new things. We didn't have to beg him to hurry up and open his presents, and I couldn't laugh and roll my eyes at his "surprised" look when he opened the day planner that he got from us every single year. We made Xmas brunch ourselves, instead of eating his greasy, but yummy, mess of eggs and bacon.

Things just kept changing even more after that. Relatives and friends that I was used to seeing every year, got married or moved away, had babies, or started new jobs. Now I am married, and have an even bigger family to include in Christmas plans, and possibly one day we will have our own children, and we will start our own Christmas traditions, and people will just have to roll with it.

That's life.

Dec 9, 2009


You know that my paycheck isn't going to last until pay day, when I am staring at the contents of my kitchen cupboards, trying to invent a recipe that will make tuna, assorted beans, and butternut squash soup into a fabulous casserole that will feed us for at least a couple days.

Back in the day when my paycheck didn't last more than 48 hours, I was very creative in the kitchen. One winter I lived on, and came to enjoy, fried hashbrowns with ripped up tortilla shells, smothered in curry powder. Of course, there were the Mr. Noodle years, in which I learned to be very creative, adding frozen veggies and soya sauce for a "Chinese food night", or onions, dill and garlic powder for "Ukrainian Night". I still crave Mr. Noodles with Cheese Whiz from time to time, although once I have a bite, I am reminded that I only ate that glob of noodles and plastic cheese out of necessity, not because it is a culinary delight.

I rarely had any meat or vegetables in the fridge, because I just couldn't afford them, and couldn't afford to let them go to waste, in case I wasn't home. Pasta and rice come in bulk, and can last months, if rationed properly. The only condiments I ever had on hand were soya sauce and mustard, and occasionally mayonnaise, for those tuna sandwiches that I could afford to make from time to time.

Luckily, for the past couple years, I have not had to worry about not having food in the house. I am making fairly good money, and make a point of keeping the house stocked as best I can with good food. I have now turned into that person, who can look at a full refrigerator, and over-stocked cupboards, and say " Aw, there's nothing to eat", just because that one thing I'm craving isn't right in front of me.

However, on occasion, there comes a week like this. Exactly one week before pay day, I'm flat ass broke. I paid for my Cuba vacation, put winter tires on the car, paid all my bills like a good girl, and went on a short trip out of town to my mom's. To top it all off, now that I have nothing but the change at the bottom of my purse, poor little Patches Magee has an ear infection, and has to go to the vet today, which we all know is never cheap.

But don't feel bad for me. I ignored the fact that winter would eventually come, and didn't put away money for the tires. I already knew that I would have to pay for the Cuba trip this week, and I could have lived without my purchases that I made on my shopping spree in Small Town.

I just have to hope that this next week will fly by, and that nothing else comes up that requires money. It is much too cold out to be whoring myself on the corner with the other ladies of the night.

Dec 8, 2009

Fuck You, Winter

Current Weather Updated: Tuesday, December 8, 2009, 9:00 CST - Regina International Airport

A few clouds


A few clouds

Nov 30, 2009

Grace in Small Things #39

Walking the dogs with my husband at midnight, in the perfect snowman building snow, and seeing their happy faces, and laughing at their fur filled with mini snowballs.

Lovely end to a not so lovely day.

Nov 28, 2009

Nov 27, 2009

Grace in Small Things #38

1. I get to have an evening away from my telephone, work, the dogs, and house-cleaning. Smyrish and I are spending the night at the Moose Jaw Spa.

2. We will drink wine and eat cheese in our Jacuzzi room.

3. I packed some sexy things for us to play with while we are there. ;)

4. The dogs will be well taken care of. Their babysitter ( whom I am most grateful for today) has an evening of Italian food and Godfather movies planned.

Nov 22, 2009

It's a Girl!

Yet again, I have the feeling that I have let down my mother, and my many mothers-in-law, in choosing to adopt a new fur baby, instead of giving birth to a human one.

However, she's darn cute, and fits right in to our little family. I figure, we now have a boy and a girl, so we're good for awhile. Or at least until our "practicing" to have real human babies pans out.

Her name is Maggie. She's 2 years old, can jump five feet in the air, and loves to hump the shit out of Patches, especially his face. He doesn't seem to mind.

Nov 19, 2009

Grace in Small Things #37

1. Friends that don't try to rain on your parade. These friends actually are excited to hear news about your life and your future, instead of saying they are and then trying to derail your plans with their negativity.

2. Those lovely folks on Etsy that sell supplies I just can't seem to find here in this town.

3. New pens.

4. My new storage cupboard. (Thanks, husband!)

5. That lovely little werewolf from the Twilight movies....why do you have to be so young? You are making me feel like a dirty old cougar. But, you are pretty cute, so it's not my fault.

6. We're going to Cuba on January 19th! Woot!

Etsy News

I am just pleased as punch with my new Etsy banners, avatars and business cards (that I need to get printed!) and wanted to show them off.

Thanks to Cutesy Pixels for the design and the work that went into them!

I am working hard at getting my stuff organized, and getting new, better photos taken, so the shop can be properly up and running as soon as possible.


Dream Exhaustion

I had a dreamed filled night last night. One of those nights where you feel as if you've been constantly dreaming...hopping from place to place, not really knowing when one dream ends and the other begins. When I have these nights, I wake up exhausted, as if I hadn't slept at all.

My night started out with a recurring dream I have been having, about Frank, the ghost at my workplace. Every few nights he pops in to my head, introduces himself ( I think you already know me, I am Frank ____, from work.") He will then introduce me to his wife, who's name I never remember by the time I wake up, and then inform me that the reason he hangs around the group home, is because his farm used to be on that land. I usually wake up at this point and try to remember what he said his last name was. Last night, I did not however, and all of a sudden, I was at Santa Monica Pier.

I'm guessing that Smyrish and I were living around there, because there were a ton of people who had come down to visit. My brother Filmstar and my friend Lynn were looking to buy some roller coasters, and bring them back to Small Town...they figured they had a money making scheme on their hands. Apparently, roller coasters are big money in rural Saskatchewan!

Lynn had brought her husband with her, so he could haul all these roller coasters back for her and Filmstar. He wasn't interested in the business part of it, so I took him out on the town. We were joined by V-man and Wench at what seemed to be a rough looking small town bar. After a few drinks, the husband started putting the moves on me, (which he would never do in real life). I screamed for V-man, but he was nowhere to be seen. After quite an argument and struggle, I grabbed a screwdriver, stabbed him in the shoulder, and ran to my car. He seemed unfazed, just yelling after me that we should be together, and he would get me, no matter what he had to do.

And then, I was at work. I sat and had an interesting conversation with one resident (who is non-verbal, by the way), and she told me she had heard about the incident with Lynn's husband, and that she knew he was like that all along, she just hadn't said anything. We proceeded to drink a bottle of wine together, talked about things that have happened between us the past few years, and then she told me she had to go back to being autistic. All of a sudden, she was non-verbal again, and acting like she does on any given day, and I was livid. I wanted her to be "normal", just for a little while longer.

My alarm went off, but I turned it off . I didn't feel like getting up early this morning, so I went back to sleep.

I was in the old record store in Small Town, looking through the cassette tapes. I saw a pile of Nirvana CD's in a bin, and decided that I needed "In Utero", and proceeded to buy 5 copies of it.*


Smyrish and I were camping. We had the VW, and a child with us. Neither of us knew the child, but we let him hang out with us anyways. We fed him, and took him fishing, and introduced him to all of our friends that were camping down the road from us. Beckstar said that we had to keep him. It was a rule that if a child appeared out of nowhere when you were in nature, you had to keep them, as they were destined to be yours anyways. I argued with her about how ridiculous that was, and went looking for his parents. After what seemed like hours of walking in the dark campground, talking with the child, I realized he truly had just appeared. Maybe Beckstar was right, and I did have to keep him.

And then, I felt someone lay on the bed, and smelled grapefruit, and pulled myself from my deep sleep to see Smyrish laying in bed eating and talking to the dog. I briefly thought about trying to go back to sleep to find out what happened with the mystery kid, but figured I'd just start a new dream entirely, so I got up, made coffee, and wrote this post.

* I realized after I wrote this, that I actually don't own any Nirvana on CD. I have everything on tape. I can't even listen to In Utero now! Boo-urns!

Nov 18, 2009

Abigail Interviews the Princess of the Universe

When Neil announced that he was doing The Great Interview Experiment again, I jumped right on that bandwagon. Last time was so much fun, and I found some great new blogs to read over my morning coffee and in the middle of the night after I had too much to drink. It also brought me some new readers, which I must admit was a nice boost to the blog ego. Oh, and I think I would probably do almost anything Neil asked of me, because he's just one cool cat. ( Neil, I said almost anything.)

I had the pleasure of interviewing someone who was not only a Canadian prairie dweller like myself, but after reading her blog for hours, I realized that I also had a lot in common with her. So much so, that this interview almost ended up being full of serious questions about losing a parent, weight, shit jobs, and so on. I decided it was best to keep the creepy stalker-ish questions to myself and not scare someone I don't know, so I kept the interview light and fluffy. ( just like her baking). I am positive that once I catch up on her archives, I'll have her answers to the more serious things I was wondering about anyways.

And now, without further adieu...

In your most recent post, you admitted to being an 80's hair band
junkie.Will you be catching Guns 'n' Roses while they are tour this winter?

Are they coming to Winnipeg? Hmmm...I doubt it though, I saw them in high school and that may have been enough for me!

As a coffee and cigarette addict myself, as well as a person who loves her beer, I have to ask....why did you give those things up?

Well, I never did smoke, so that was a non-issue. Beer - I keep trying sips of it, and it's always given me an "eeeewww" reaction. As for coffee? Well, I was always told that I was "too young" to drink it, then no one ever told me the magic day that I was old enough. I guess I just never really started. I do love the smell though :)

Tell us about your "experimental" baking.

I like seeing a photo somewhere and seeing if I can re-create it. I saw a chocolate covered cherry cheesecake photo once, and just pulled bits from various recipes that had all the elements and...voila! It was sort of a success. Kinda...

Winnipeg sometimes gets a bad rap...what with the cold winters, killer mosquitoes, floods, crime and so on. What do you love most about Winnipeg?

Hmmm, it's small, so I can generally find everything. I get lost REALLY easily. And yeah, I'm serious. That is my favourite thing :)

When you were a child, did you have an imaginary friend?

Not really. I think I had far more faith in the tangible. I never really "bought" Santa Claus or the tooth fairy etc either.

If you could travel to anywhere in the world, where would it be, and why?

I'd like to go back to England, I don't feel like I had time to really do it justice. It has so much history, I can't imagine ever being bored living there...

What's yummier? Bannock or poutine?

Poutine. Hands down. Not that I eat that anymore. :P

From reading your blog, I learned that you are very interested in your family's history. Are there any resources that you use to learn more about your genealogy?

My grandmothers on both sides lived in small communities that put together "Our First 100 Years" books - those gave me a lot of hints on where to start. Then I started ordering from Vital Stats - often something like a death cert will include parents names and place of birth etc, so you can work backwards from there...

As of right now, what are the three things in life that are making you the happiest?

Losing weight, working on my Master's application (weird!) and the beautiful man I'm on 2 committees with at work :P

If you want to learn more about The Princess of the Universe, check out her awesome blog at

Nov 17, 2009

The Never-Ending Weight Issue

This morning I checked my email, and found a message from , telling me that I should enter my weight loss progress. The message went on to say that although I track my meals and workouts, tracking my weight loss as well will be a huge motivator for me, reminding me what a great job I am doing.

Well Daily Burn, I am not tracking my weight loss, because other than the five pounds I lost a couple months ago, I have not lost anything else. So there.

It is quite disheartening.

I started tracking my food intake and exercise regularly quite awhile ago. I have learned that I exercise no less than three times per week, and no more than six. I only eat pasta (whole grain) every 2 weeks, sometimes less. My rice intake has gone down quite a bit as well. When I was still eating meat daily, my protein intake was where it should be (120g-205g per day), but now I am not getting enough. (usually between 100g-120g per day). My carb intake is just right for my age, height and weight loss goal, usually coming in at 156 g per day. My daily caloric intake as a whole since I stopped eating meat has been extremely low ( 1400-1900 per day, some days as low as 900), but my fat intake is up...most likely due to salad dressings, and eating more eggs than usual to get that protein in. I am now paying closer attention to those "hidden" fats, to see what I can cut out, or what is good and should be in my diet.

Usually one day a week I do indulge. I drink beer or wine, eat food that isn't healthy (pizza, salty things), and usually the day after that is the day that I do not exercise at all. So yes, I admit, I am not as healthy as I should be. Those things shouldn't be a part of my life at all. But seriously, you would think that all the exercise and eating rabbit food would pay off in some way.

What am I supposed to do???

Nov 8, 2009

Grace in Small Things #36

1. A hangover free weekend.

2. Super strong coffee and visiting with my fabulous cousin Neener.

3. Being able to wear sweatpants and a bandanna to work this morning.

4. Sunday evening adult only swim @ the pool!

5. Febreeze. The greatest invention in my lifetime. To me, anyways.

Nov 3, 2009

Grace in Small Things #35

After a shit-tastic day at work, constant stomach pains that seem to have no cause, and coming home to dog poop on the floor, I had a hard time thinking of something good about my life, even though there are many good things in my life.

Then all of a sudden, I had a flashback of watching The Palinode sing and dance to "Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go" last Saturday night at the House of Pain, and all was right with the world again. That boy sure does know his Wham!.

Grace in Small Things #34

1. Having a table to sit at out in the courtyard.

2. The sun is shining, and there isn't a foot of snow on the ground.

3. Although they were fun, I am happy that birthday week and Halloween are over.

4., and . They have been a huge help in giving me ideas as of what to cook, now that we're trying to be vegetarian and all.

Nov 2, 2009

Grace in Small Things #33

1. Daydreaming all day long.

2. Twilight books ( yes, you heard me right, I am actually reading them all and enjoying them)

3. Puppy kisses.

4. Laughing at puppy farts.

5. My super sturdy new bookshelf.

6. Green tea.

7. Friends that will go watch dick tricks with you. ;)

8. Sales at Old Navy.

9. A small wage increase, is still an increase.

10. Travel books.

Oct 28, 2009

A Post in Which I Show You Pictures of My Dog

My dog has a bit of an attitude problem lately.

If he isn't sleeping on the couch, he's up and about, eating garbage, pooping all over the place, or hiding rotting food in his doggy bed for a special meal at a later date, among other things.

If you yell at him, send him to his kennel, spank his bum, or threaten death upon him, he either turns his head around backwards to ignore you, or barks back. He's really mouthy lately, has an answer for everything. Sometimes, he'll even slap my face, so I've started to threaten the same thing. When I do threaten him, I sound like Stewart's mother from Mad TV.

You'd think that he'd be grateful. We buy him expensive food, take him to the vet when he needs to go, give him treats, take him for car rides and walks, and I have even given up, and let him sleep on my pillow every night. But no, he's still a bad boy. Fucking teenagers, and their know-it-all attitudes.

* No worries though, I do love my Patches with all my heart. He's just bad to the bone, a rebel without a cause....and he knows it. He also knows he's cute as a button, and all will be forgiven, as long as he does something sweet or silly. He's a smart little fucker.

Grace in Small Things #32

1. Veggie ground round.

2. My mom being healthy.

3. Etsy purchases when they come in the mail. Even though these aren't for me, it was still exciting, and I can't wait until Xmas when I can give them to those special people.

4. Doing my laundry at work. Sure, it's not allowed...but I just don't give a shit.

5. Daydreaming of California, and what it will be like when we move there.....

Oct 25, 2009

The Exercise Schedule

Although I have been pretty good at getting a lot of swimming done every week since I got back from California, I decided tonight that I really needed to have some sort of schedule, to properly keep exercise a part of my day, as well as add in some new exercises that my body needs. It can be hard to keep on track, what with an ever-changing work schedule, being on-call, exhausted from extra shifts, and so on. Also, soon it will be cold....and all Saskatchewan residents know that once it freezes over, it is extremely hard to feel motivated to do anything other than lay on the couch, and try and stay warm.

So, I present you with.....the weekly exercise schedule.

I have posted it on my fridge, I have posted it on, and I am now posting it here.

Monday - Aquacise, 6pm.
Tuesday - Yoga at home, or recumbent bike at the gym
Wednesday - Weights at home, or weights at the gym
Thursday - Yoga at home, or recumbent bike at the gym
Friday - Aquacise, 9:30am
Saturday - walk outside, or walk at the track
Sunday - Swimming, 6:30pm

( Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday are the hardest to plan, as I am on-call, and work til midnight each day. I kept it simple, and will try to add on a swim or walk if at all possible)

Extras, that I already do, or will be doing:

Dog walks, daily
Swimming at work, 1-2 times a week, for 45 minutes
Deep Water Workout class, after Monday aquacise, from Nov 2 - Dec 14
Walks at work, at least 1x per week

Nutrition Rules:
No chips
No fast food
I will not keep beer in the house
I will try, as much as my schedule will allow, not to eat after 9pm

Feel free to be annoying and ask me how I am doing, and if I am slacking, breaking the rules, losing weight, feeling better, feeling worse, whatever. Your questions will motivate me not to quit.

5 on the 25

A few random sentences, for a few random folks that I adore.....

1. If your birthday party is as fun as it was last year, I will have to be prepared for a Tuesday hangover. I hope you have a good one!

2. I am so grateful for everything you do for me. You really have no idea. I don't know what I did to be so lucky.

3. I know, I saw you in June, but that seems so long ago! I can't wait to see you on Friday and catch up! Halloween is going to be so much better with you here to party with!

4. Seeing your smiling, glowing face on Thursday night, made my week.

5. You live so close, and yet I haven't seen you in ages it seems. We need to remedy this situation soon, I'm going through withdrawal.

Oct 18, 2009

Grace in Small Things #31

1. It's my day off today, and the weather is beautiful.

2. If I can find my husband, I am going to convince him to go for a drive in the country.

3. I'll even take the dog for a walk out there.

4. And buy pumpkins....carving isn't my thing, but I love roasting the seeds.

5. It's nice to have the energy to want to do something other than sit and watch T.V.

Oct 4, 2009

The End. Good-bye Master Cleanse.

Even though this would be day six, and I have yet to eat today, I technically finished five days of the Master Cleanse.

When it came to the whole not eating part of the cleanse, it was actually quite easy for me. I was craving popcorn and battered mushrooms for some reason the past three days, and last night, I gave in and had the popcorn, even though I wasn't all that hungry. But it was oh, sooooo goood.

The problem for me with this cleanse, is that I really didn't feel "cleansed" at all. Everything I read told me that I was going to shit out decades of waste that was just hanging out in my colon, and well, I don't think that I did. I did the Sea Salt Water Chug one day, and that was enough. The taste, and the intense stomach cramps that came after, were nothing short of horrendous. I would have rather had the flu. I truly do think, that I am not as unhealthy as I previously thought....there was just nothing in me to evacuate.

I lost about 8-10 pounds. which is good I guess, but for me, that is the equivalent of a regular sized person losing one pound. It's a start I guess, and hopefully I can keep it off.

By day three, I realized how easy it was for me to not eat at all. Sure, I was tired, and my daily swim was hard with no real energy, but I dealt. I figured I could just starve myself until 20 pounds dropped off, and then go from there.

I probably could have. However, by day four, my brain had gotten confused, and thought that I was starving myself because I was depressed, and not because I was "cleansing". That is not good.

My annual mental anguish and depression, that I am accustomed to, kicked in in a matter of hours. Next thing I knew, I was sad, hating myself, and planning on becoming an anorexic, just to make myself look sexy, and make others happy. (Sound crazy? Yup, sure does!) Little comments from people that meant nothing, all of a sudden meant everything to me.

I realized late last night, that I was not doing this cleanse anymore to feel better physically, but because I was depressed....and when I am depressed, I tend not to eat. My appetite is non-existent.

So, today I am going to try and ween myself back on to food. I have to take it easy, otherwise I will be shitting all the live long day. I have planned some healthy meals and snacks to take to work with me this week, and hope that eating well, and continuing my daily exercise, will help kick this depression to the curb.

In short, the Master Cleanse just didn't work for me, the way it was supposed to, although it has worked for some, and may work for you. All I wanted was to feel better, and lose 20 pounds in a week like Beyonce, but hey, you don't always get what you want.

Sep 30, 2009

My Master Cleanse

Ever since we got back from our holiday, my body has not been too happy with me. I partied less this past summer than any summer in the history of me, but I could still feel the effects of living off BBQ's and beer, and letting myself slide when it came to the exercise routine I had been so vigilant about the Fall, Winter and Spring before.

Even though I had continuous compliments on my looks, my new hair, and the ever so annoying " My, you look like you've lost weight!" comment was plentiful, I knew that I had gained about 20 pounds this summer, and my body in general just felt like shit. And compliments are hard to take, when you know that they could be false statements, made just to make you feel better.

My weight has been a constant hot topic with everyone I know, and myself, for years now. I have spent the past month or so, really thinking about why I got fat, and let myself get even fatter. It isn't that I live off junk food, and don't exercise. I eat healthy foods for the most part, and I am forced to be active every day at work with my job. After talking with Wench on a couple occasions, I started to realize what the REAL problems were, and felt empowered in a way, to finally know what the hell my problems are, and have been. I was finally ready to take control of myself, learn to let the past go, and get myself healthy.

I was talking to a friend last weekend, about The Master Cleanse. She was doing a seven day stint, and although it was hard, she was very pleased with the results. She wasn't doing it to lose weight, because she's already teensy, however she did lose quite a bit anyways. She said she felt better, being able to get all the crap (literally) out of her system, and as I listened to her talk about how she wanted to better her eating habits once she was done, I just couldn't help but jump on that bandwagon. I needed to do something, and a cleanse, no matter how hard, would be a good place to start from scratch.

A few days later, she took me shopping for all my organic ingredients, and I started to mentally prepare myself for no food for a week.

On Monday night, I ate my last meal, of leftover couscous and veggie ground round, and tuna on a whole wheat bagel, and we called Film Star over to collect all the perishable food we had left in the house so there were no temptations, and no worrying on my part about wasting food.

Mornings are hard for me on the best of days. But waking up yesterday, and realising that I could not have coffee before I started my 16 hour day of work, was soul-crushing . I grumbled and bitched, and stumbled on my feet and words, as I made my Lemonade drink, and headed to work.

It was a long day. The caffeine withdrawal was so intense, that I kept getting flashbacks of Trainspotting, and that damn baby crawling on the ceiling...praying that it wouldn't happen to me. Luckily, it didn't. I was just a bitch all day, and everyone had to deal with it.

I rarely eat more than one meal a day, so I thought that giving up food would be easy peasy. However, at work my job is to cook meals and snacks for the residents...and I cook them some fantastic meals if I do say so myself. I never realized until yesterday, how much "taste-testing" I do when I cook for them. It was incredibly hard not to take a nibble here, a taste there....I wanted to try the meal I had cooked so badly, that I literally had to stop myself from licking their plates when they were done.

Once that passed, I was fine. I had a few hunger pangs, but nothing that a big glass of water wouldn't cure.

I came home and had my organic laxative tea, and went to bed.

This morning, I was extremely disappointed in the lack of explosive bowel movement. Everything I had read, said to be prepared for the intense colon cleansing that goes on. True, I have yet to do the Sea Salt Water Chug, which I will try on Friday, but I thought that the laxative on an empty stomach would give me something to talk about. Ah well, there's always tomorrow!

For those who are wondering what I am consuming....

The Lemonade

2 litres of distilled water
14 tablespoons of organic maple syrup
14 tablespoons of organic lemon juice
1/2 teaspoon of cayenne pepper

I break that up into three bottles, so I have three "meals" a day. I also drink as much water as I can, and 2 cups of Organic Over-night Relief Laxative tea before bed.

I will keep you posted on how the rest of the week goes.

Sep 21, 2009


I can't decide if I should buy tickets for the Stone Temple Pilots show here in November. I loved them in high school, but would they be any good now? I just don't know.

Sep 20, 2009

Hangover Days

If I was to have a threesome, it would be with Jason Collett and Feist. If I wasn't married of course. But I am married, so the threesome would be me, my husband and Mr. Collett.

Sep 15, 2009

Grace in Small Things #30

1. Went to aquacise last night, and am going again in about 30 minutes.

2. Having friends to exercise with. Makes it easier to get up and go after work, or in the mornings!

3. The dog urinating on his pee pads ( but still pooping right beside them! argh!)

4. Bandanas on bad hair days.

5. "I Love You, Man"....I laughed my balls off, just like Smyrish said I would.

Sep 13, 2009

Sep 12, 2009

Liquor Store Run

I've been really missing my dad the past couple days for some reason, and then this song* came on in the car while I was running around doing errands this afternoon. Sheesh. Talk about an emotional liquor store run.

* I realize this video is about her mom, but to me, the lyrics applied to me and my dad.

Sep 9, 2009

What I Did in California and Nevada on my End of Summer Vacation

My entire life, I have heard stories about Los Angeles. Most stories involved tales of the horrible smog, the insane drivers, the freeway, gangs, and the like. Everything I read, was the opposite. I read of poets, musicians, old Hollywood starlets, and hippies and lived vicariously through their stories of fame and fortune, drugs, love and good times on the Sunset Strip and Venice Beach.

Luckily, the latter was what I experienced for the most part. There was constant smoke on the horizon, due to the wildfires, but I didn't notice any smog. The traffic was a bit scary at first, but we quickly got the hang of it. And everyone we came across was friendly and helpful. Even the crackheads were lively, and welcomed us to Hollywood.

The beginning of our trip started out rocky. My one and only complaint about The States, would have to be their definition of a "debit card". Going on vacation, and finding out that the little card that holds all of your money is useless, is a scary and frustrating feeling. Luckily, we got it worked out to some degree.....Smyrish put money on my Visa ( which in the U.S, is a debit card), and we were able to use our debit cards at the ATM machines to get cash ( our debit cards are called ATM cards).

Once we had money, we were good to go, even though, by then, we had missed the Ween concert, and were frustrated beyond belief. So, we found Knuckle Toes, drank some Malibu at her hostel, and went to bed.

For me, being in Hollywood was amazing. It is one place, that when I was younger, I figured I would live, even though, that obviously didn't happen ( neither did my idea of living in Paris and drinking myself to death right after my best-selling novel came out). Seeing all of the places that I had read and day-dreamed about was almost as over-whelming as realizing just how huge Los Angeles is.

However, a city is a city, and after a couple days of wandering in the intense heat, and catching the Nine Inch Nails show, I was ready to get away from the craziness.

Smyrish and I finally got a rental car, and got the heck outta Dodge.

We went to the Santa Monica Pier. The second we got there, I felt chilled out. Coming from Saskatchewan, where the ocean is nowhere to be seen, and summer was only about a month long this year, it felt like I had just arrived in heaven. Smyrish took me on the roller coaster, on which I had a mild panic attack, and then we splashed about in the water, ate hot dogs and cheese on sticks, and had an all around good time. We also went back there for our last night...and got drunk on girl drinks before sitting on the beach and watching the waves.

The next day, we hopped in the car, and headed to Las Vegas, in search of Smyrish's mom, hoping we could surprise her, and do supper. We never did get ahold of her, but we decided to spend the night. I had never been to Vegas, and never had actually planned on going there, due to the fact that I don't gamble. However, I am a huge fan of stories of "Old Vegas", and CSI, so it was super neat to be there. I even ended up gambling...spent 4 bucks on the penny slots and won $23.00, which bought us a couple drinks down on Fremont, before we headed back to the strip and checked out an oxygen bar. I am definitely going to pressure some friends to plan a trip to Vegas in the future....we would have a blast!

When we got back from Vegas, the next destination was Venice Beach.

We were there approximately one minute, before I decided that I never wanted to leave. Venice Beach was what my brain told me California was all about. Buskers, muscle men, hippies selling their wares, surfers.....that is exactly what I wanted to see and experience. I swam in the ocean for the first time in my life ( I have been to oceans before, but tend to vacation to them when they're bloody cold), and couldn't get enough. We wandered about the markets after the beach, and then took a drive up the Pacific Coast Highway.....a lovely day all around.

Overall, even with the bumps in the road, it has been a fantastic week. If nothing else, going to somewhere with a warm climate cemented in my head that I need to get away from Saskatchewan. I love it, but I can no longer deal with the weather that makes me all bi-polar and crazy and sad and depressing and so on. Our brains are full of life plans now....who knows what we'll end up doing, or end up going, but at least California taught us that we don't have to settle for what we have.

For now, I am counting down the days until our official month long honeymoon to Cuba. That may seem ridiculous, but January always comes much too fast.

Grace in Small Things #29

1. Catching up on Pocket Buddha.

2. Picking up Patches, and realizing that he doesn't hate me for leaving him for a week.

3. Coming home and finding some Stella Artois on the counter.

4. Hearing that my super fantastic cousin may be moving to The City next month.

5. A surprise visit from AJ, Bink and Mr. Bink before we left for California.

6. Finally, after 4 summers of searching, finding a cowboy hat that fits my small head. Just had to go all the way to Venice Beach to find it. Hopefully I don't lose it by next summer.

Aug 27, 2009

That's the Tooth.

On Saturday night, after a long-winded discussion with a bouncer at a local nightclub about dress-code, and how ridiculous it was that a man cannot enter without sleeves on his shirt, but a woman could enter with her tits hanging out, I realized that something was up with one of my molars. I informed the ladies that I thought my filling was coming out, and then had a few shooters to forget about it.

By the next morning, I was missing at least three quarters of said tooth. It hurt, almost as much as my hangover.

On Monday morning, I decided I had to try and get in to see the dentist. Luckily, they could get me in by 2:30pm that day.

I finished my work, and then headed out for some retail therapy. While perusing cardigans at Walmart, I overheard some girls talking about the AC/DC concert that was that night, and how they couldn't believe that 40,000 people had "wasted their money to see some band that hadn't done anything in 20 years". I bit my lip, glared at them a little, and figured they either A) they must not be from small town Saskatchewan, or B) they were more the type of girls that would spend $200 to see New Kids on the Block.

So anyways, at 2:30pm, I went to visit the dentist. After gagging during 3 X-rays, and discussing the fact that my dental plan licks balls, and I'm broke, we decided that the molar wasn't all that important, and he would just pull it. If I ever won the lottery, I would get a fake tooth put in at that time.

It took 3 needles for my mouth to feel the slightest bit numb. The dentist started to twist and turn and pull on the bloody tooth, but it just would not budge. He realized that the root was attached to the molar beside it for some reason. Alas, that one had to go too.

After some tears, and screaming, and worrying that I was scaring the children in the chairs around me, the fucking things came out. And yes, I felt every last bit of it. Ouch.

However, my main concern was that it was already after 4pm, and I needed to pick up my AC/DC tickets in an hour, and get to the show!

With a mouth full of bloody gauze, that I changed about 12 times throughout the evening, I somehow was a trooper, and had an amazing time at the show. By the end, I was a mess....tired, sore, and in no mood to party like I had promised. I felt like a big baby, but I had to go home.

Although it was well worth it, I hope you appreciate what I went through for you AC/DC.

Oh, and thanks for the amazing show!

Grace in Small Things #28

1. Finally having a really big messy cry over the loss of a friend and parental figure that I loved dearly. Feels so good to just get those emotions out.

2. Realizing that I really need to keep in touch better with people...and knowing that I will do so from now on. If you don't have your don't have much.

3. The gap where my molars used to be finally stopped bleeding.

4. AC fucken DC! What a great show....too bad I was in such pain!

5. My husband, who tries to do whatever he can to make me happy....even when I'm being all bi-polar and difficult about it. Not everyone can put up with crazy.

6. Everything is as worked out as I'm going to work it out, for our trip to Los Angeles next week.

7. I have made big progress in the thank-you card department....and hope to have them all written and mailed before I leave for the States.

Aug 19, 2009

Grace in Small Things #27

1. I found homemade beet borscht from my aunt in my freezer.

2. Eating that borscht for 3 meals in 1 day, was super awesome and fantastic.

3. It was so good in fact, that I thought I would make my own in the slow cooker.

4. I ate the last of my aunt's borscht at work tonight.

5. I came home at midnight, and was overjoyed that my borscht in the slow cooker, smelled the same as hers. Although I did put too much cabbage in mine.

6. I cannot stop farting. The smell is intense. A part of me wishes that someone were here to smell this rancid borscht gas. Someone that would think it was funny of course, not someone that would be disgusted and lecture me on my cabbage consumption.

7. But, I am alone, late at night, farting on my yoga ball while playing online Scrabble, and I am quite enjoying myself.

8. I can't wait to taste my borscht tomorrow!

Aug 8, 2009

Grace in Small Things #26 - Folk Festival Edition

1. Finding a parking spot at 7:00am before the Farmer's Market people come to steal them all.

2. The weather channel changing its mind and saying it will be 18C with only a splatter of rain, instead of the 15C with torrential downpours.

3. The guy across the path that sells me Hemp Coffee every year.

Jul 29, 2009

Grace in Small Things #25

1. Getting paid to sit at the Moose Jaw Spa for the afternoon.

2. Knowing that I have just one more shift of work, and then I'm camping for the weekend!

3. Knowing that after Folk Fest, I get to camp two different provincial parks!

4. Having a big belly laugh with my mother-in-law.

5. Hugs from the father-in-law. He gives good hug.

6. A glass of wine before bed at the bistro table in the courtyard......

Jul 17, 2009

And This is How it Went.....

Well, the wedding and camping trip are over, and it's back to the daily grind in the Abigail-Smyrish household.

The wedding went well, although not without a few small bumps in the road along the way. We laughed, we cried, and we drank AJ's homemade wine. Now that I'm looking back, I didn't dance at all that night, which is a bit of a drag, but I had such insane cramps all day, that I am just happy that I made it through.

I wish I would have had time to visit more with all the family from out of town, and get to know some of my new family a bit better. But, all the guests I have talked to have said that they had a fabulous time, and they all agree that the ceremony on the beach was short, and sweet and lovely....and that makes me happy.

Our annual camping trip followed the wedding, and we had some new campers this year, which made it all the more fun. You know that you are growing up, when friends are bringing their children camping....

We had some issues with a yogurt addicted bear, but other than some stolen food, clawed up coolers, and a broken tent, we were okay. I figure, we were in the bears house, and he just felt he had the right to steal from his guests. Not necessarily a nice thing to do to your house guests, but hey, some people, and animals, are just jerks.

Coming back to the city was totally depressing. Going back to work made it even more so. I have been actually thinking really hard about what I want to do in life, for the first time in my life, and am preparing myself for some major changes in the next few months...and trying to convince myself that it is okay to make some changes, just for me. I am not exactly sure what those changes will be as of yet, but I'm working on it. Luckily, I have one hell of a husband, and all he wants for me is to be happy, and not stressed out....he's got my back.

Anyhow, my mothers-in-law are coming over soon to visit,and Smyrish is bringing home some lunch, so I should finish making this apartment look livable.

Have a good weekend!

Jun 23, 2009

5 More Days.....

The countdown to getting this wedding day over with is on. I thought everything was all peachy keen, but in the past week, I have learned that there is no such thing as a simple wedding, plans just don't work out sometimes, and a wedding has nothing to do with the bride and groom, it's all about pleasing the family and guests. We are trying to keep our cool, and stay relaxed, and thankfully, Smyrish and I are one hell of a team, and have each others backs.

Things are coming together nicely, for the most part. Everyone has a place to stay, the caterer is working on the meal as I type this, the playlist for the dinner and dance is done, the dress looks as good on me as it can, considering I gained weight, instead of losing the 40 pounds I've been trying to lose, and we have our rings. By this afternoon, I'll have the car packed, and be totally ready for camping and we'll have our marriage license, and the cake, and my new mother-in-law is buying us a table for the ceremony ( which will later look great in our courtyard!)

We just have to confirm with the photographer what we want done, and call the Marriage Commissioner to confirm a meeting place, and I need to get Pixx Axe to make time to put my hair extensions back in....which is a biggie, as that takes up a shitload of time, and if they don't get in, I'm going to have one ugly head of hair.

But, it'll all work out, as life always does, just not on my time I guess.

May 12, 2009

It's That Time of Year Again....

As per usual, the Arts Festival is but a few days away, and I am positive that I did not make enough "stock" over the winter.

I have a few bags left over from last year, and I have about six that are "almost done". I have not made any jewellery to sell, and never did get around to finishing the journals I was making, because I don't have a drill. I have 4 of my weird springy vase holders, and I actually did buy vases for them, and I should have about 6 summer dresses completed before the 23rd arrives.

I know that if I use all my extra time to make bags, I could pump out a shitload in the next week. However....

I think the reason that I don't have as many wares ready to sell this year, is not because I was lazy, but because I decided quality was better than quantity. But, now I am afraid that the few quality items that I do have, won't sell...and then what?

Due to my awesomeness (hehe), I am raising some of my prices this year, and am afraid that will turn some people away. Hopefully it won't, but that's the way I am, I worry about these things.

And on that note, I should really do some sewing before I have to head off to my real job for the night. I'm working on a crazy looking dress, that I hope someone will adore.

May 11, 2009

Grace in Small Things #24

1. The smell of rain.

2. New material, and the ideas that come with it.

3. Bacardi Breezers left over from Saturday.

4. New clothes, that make me feel pretty.

5. New bras, that are a 38DD, instead of a 42DD.

6. Reconnecting with a friend on Saturday.

7. Owning our own BBQ.

May 8, 2009

Summer Nostalgia

I'm just sitting here looking at pictures from summers gone by.......

......and all I have to say is, that if it doesn't warm up soon, I'm going to lose my ever lovin' mind!

May 6, 2009

Grace in Small Things #23

1. Good-bye kisses when I leave for work, and the fact that when I just say "More!", I get more kisses. I could do it a bazillion times over, and get a kiss every time.

2. Getting to use work time, to visit friends and family ....and having them be super friendly and comfortable with my buddy from the group home....even when she yelled out "Abigail, I wiped my bum in the bathroom!" really loudly so everyone could hear. :)

3. Smyrish said he liked my hair. That compliment made my day, even though I didn't really show it at the time. I was hoping that he did.

4. Having a banker help me find money, instead of just taking it away.

5. Owning proper mannequins to display clothes on for the summer festivals.

6. Although the thunderstorm I was excited about this afternoon was sub-par, at least it didn't snow.

May 3, 2009

Road Trippin'

Scene: I've been on the highway for an hour, driving in a direction I've never been, with no destination in mind. I just needed to get away and think. As I am belting out "Hello, Dolly", I look down, and realize that if I choose to keep going, I need to find a town with a gas station. A couple minutes later, I see a grain elevator, the ultimate sign of community in Saskatchewan, and pull off the highway. I find the town hotel/bar, park, and walk in.

Bartender: Sorry ma'am, we're not serving and the offsale is closing soon too. It's Sunday night.

Me: No problem, I was just wondering if there was somewhere in this town to get gas at this time of night.

Bartender: Everyone except us closes by 10pm.

Me: I figured so. It's the small town way. Guess I'll just have to suck it up and drive back to the city.

Bartender: That's one hell of a sunburn you got there.

Me: *nods*

Bartender: So what are you running away from?

Me: Oh fuck, who the hell knows anymore.

I got back into the car, wondering why I was on the lamb. Where was I going? Where was I trying to get to? What was bothering me so much that I was about to just leave everything, for a highway I'd never been on?

I have no idea.

I chose to head home. I'm glad that I did. I learned tonight, that I don't have to leave the province to think, I just need to do some drivin', some singin', and let myself have it. After that, I'll keep on truckin'.

Grace in Small Things #22

It is warm enough for me to wear one of my new summer dresses today, and as soon as I know what my plans are for the day, I can get out and enjoy the sunshine.

The end.

May 2, 2009

Grace in Small Things #21

1. My new hair extensions look amazing, and by tonight, thy will be done. I feel pretty.

2. There is beer in my fridge. It is almost cold.

3. I only have to wait 3 more hours for human contact and conversation.

4. I don't know if she knows it yet, but Pixx Axe is getting shitfaced with me tonight, since no one else is, and we're gonna have fun dammit!

5. I went to Kronau today for the first time, for no reason at all, except to drive around, have a cigarette and kill time before my shift ended.

6. I got some sweet lovin' twice yesterday. Huzzah!

Apr 29, 2009

Grace in Small Things #20

1. Being the supper guinea pig, and getting to test out Smyrish's new lentil/rice/turkey bacon creation. YUMMY!

2. Heading out to The Pub after supper, and seeing the smiling faces of my lovely lady friends, and the Palinode.

3. Hanging with Schmutzie. We always stay out way too late, and drink way too much, and have a great time doing what we do.

4. Listening to my brother talk about his new girlfriend, and how wonderful she is, and how happy he is when he's with her. He made me think that maybe its okay that he is dating my sister-in-law, which in turn, makes him my brother-in-law.

5. Coming home to Smyrish with a bag of Burger King, and laying on the couch together to watch The Wonder Years.

6. Learning that while I was out at The Pub, Smyrish took in my new bicycle with the blown tire, and brought home a whole new bike, tires intact.

Life is good right now.

Apr 20, 2009

My Wedding Dream

So there I am. One hour before I am to be hitched to the man of my dreams. I'm waiting in my mother's rented condo, for Wench to come and bring me my dress.

She shows up, happy as can be, bragging about what a good job she did on my dress. I look at it, and scream. It is a flowery, poofy, flamenco dress. NOT the dress we had been talking about all year, nor the one I had wanted to wear.

Seconds later, I am standing on the beach in my ugly flamenco dress, and my maid of honor strolls up to me, in dirty jeans and a blue fleece hoodie. She informs me that she felt too fat to wear the dress she had bought, and says that she is going to just " go casual", because that's what the boys are doing anyways.

I ask her what she means, and she points to Smyrish and his best man. They are walking towards me in sand covered denim shorts, and matching Nine Inch Nails t-shirts. I start screaming at the three of them.

" This is my goddamn day! As if you fuckers can't just wear something that is remotely CLEAN!"

They tell me that it's not like it matters, now that I have the wrong dress on, and I scream at them some more, before I storm off, in search of my hair guru, Pixx Axe.

I find Pixx at the hall. She, and many uninvited guests, have already tied into the booze that we were to sell at the reception. I try to get her to come with me to do my hair, to no avail. The other people want her to stay, they are having too much fun together. My maid of honor shows up at this time, and tells me to "Loosen up, you are supposed to be enjoying your day." We get into another screaming match, before one of the uninvited guests decides to butt in and tell me what a bitch I am being, for ruining their holiday at the beach.

Finally, after much screaming, and running through throngs of people, I convince Pixx to come and do my hair. She agrees, because truly, I do look awful. I start to thank her for her help....and then I realize that she is shaving my head bald.

We are immediately back in my mothers rented condo. Smyrish walks in, and tells me that he isn't sure he can marry me. I am too uptight, and I shouldn't worry so much about what people are wearing, or what I look like. All he wanted to do was marry me, and he didn't care if he was covered in mud, or I was in an ugly poofy dress.

And then I wake up. Dream interpretations welcome.

Apr 15, 2009

Grace in Small Things #19

Can't think of a bloody thing to be grateful for today. I am in a mood, and am not sure if I should blame the weather, the photo shoot that kicked me in the self-esteem, hormones, or what.

One thing however, that I am truly grateful for, is the amazing review of my Etsy shop done by Northern Mama. She is also hosting a giveaway over at her site, for one of my funky head scarf bags.

Go ahead and check it out : , it would give me another thing to be grateful for today.

Apr 2, 2009

Grace in Small Things #18 - "In a Word"

1. Orgasms.

2. Flip-Flops.

3. Puddles.

4. Lobster.

5. Fabric.

6. Rodney.

Mar 29, 2009

Grace in Small Things #17

1. I had a really good time last night with the ladies. I also learned that I really like grapes dipped in chocolate fondue.

2. I had the worst sleep ever last night, but at least that means I should sleep well tonight.

3. I am almost ready for Smyrish's birthday party tomorrow, and am super excited to go Mini-Golfing!

4. I cleaned out my closet yesterday, and purged all the clothes I don't wear.... so today I went shopping and started filling it up again. With summer clothes. Huzzah!

5. The Juno's are on tonight. It's the only awards show I watch....I loves me some Canadian music.

Mar 27, 2009

25 Albums - Part Deux

6. Vauxhall and I - Morrissey

At a family reunion one summer, my cousin made me come and listen to this Morrissey album with him. I had listened to The Smiths a bit, but had never heard any of Morrissey's solo work. ( Remember, in the early 90's, I was still fairly young!)

I was hooked. Since then, Morrissey has been a staple in my life, especially when I am feeling down. Anyone who has dated me knows, that if they walk into my house, and I'm laying on the bed listening to a Morrissey album, there is something wrong with me in the head.

7. Add It Up - The Violent Femmes

I didn't realize it until just now, but the same cousin as mentioned above, got me hooked on the Violent Femmes. I love "Add it Up", well, because it's a compilation of "hits". From the second you hit play, you know you're in for a punk rock/rockabilly/gospel/pop music roller coaster ride of fun.

8. Nevermind - Nirvana

I know, it sounds cliche. Didn't this album "just totally change the lives" (sarcasm) of everyone in my age group? Well, let's me honest. It did, to many. Unlike many other grunge bands that I was into back in the day, when I hear Nevermind, or any Nirvana album, I still get excited. It was nice to be an angst ridden teenager, and have someone out there with power and fame, that felt just the same way as I did.

Kurt Cobain would have been 42 this year. His birthday is over now, but for all you die-hard fans out there who celebrate his birthday, you may want to check out this link, just for kicks :

9. Phantom Power - The Tragically Hip

This album came out the summer that I ran away from home, to Vancouver. Every time I hear a song from it, I get a sick feeling at first....remembering how badly I scared and pissed off family and friends.

But, I still have it in heavy rotation after all these years. Gord Downie let the other members of the band write songs for this album, and I think that what makes it so different from some of the other Hip albums. All the songs are beautifully written, and tell stories that are uniquely Canadian.

On a side note, when I was walking down the train tracks in Thompson, Manitoba a few years back, with Mr. Henry, I couldn't help but start humming "Thompson Girl". now that song will forever be ingrained in my memory. Thanks, Das Hips.

10. Mellow Gold - Beck

I'll never forget it. One day, a bunch of us went to a friends house to chill out at lunch time. We were hanging out in her basement, when the video for "Loser" came on. It was brand spankin' new at the time, and I had never seen it, being stuck with Farm TV, and all.

My girlfriends who had seen it already, started complaining about how stupid it was, and what horrible music, and going on about "oh-my-god-he-dresses-so-weird", and so on.

Meanwhile, I was on my knees in front of the television, thinking " Oh my god, there's someone else in the world that dresses as weird as I do." And I totally dug the music.

It wasn't long after that, that I had a fall-out with the popular girls I had known and been friends with since kindergarten, and my life was never the same.

And I thank Beck for that.