May 24, 2007

Going to the Psychic

I have been putting off going to a free psychic reading that I earned for 'giving out good energy', for months now. I know the psychic personally, and I respect her, and believe that she knows what she's talking about. Many of my friends have gone to her, most of them more than once, and everyone is amazed by what she knows, the things she tells them, and also how blunt she is when giving her readings.

I don't know exactly why I have been putting off going for my own reading. It's free, and free is a good price. She wants me to come and see her, and apparently has something important to tell me, or so I assume. She tells others who have gone to see her for a reading, that I will be okay, especially now that I have discarded a certain 'evil' from my life (her words), and she is happy and relieved that I did, because she was worried about me.

The fact that she has been mentioning me to others when they are getting their readings, has peaked my interest. Why does she care so much? What is it that she knows that I don't know? Why was she so worried about the 'evil'? Do I need to know what she knows?

The first few times that I met her, I thought that she hated me. The way that she looked at me, she would almost glare at me, and stare right through me. I mentioned it to the Cookster, and she told me that the psychic was listening to my spirit guides, or maybe looking at someone else that may be around me. That freaked me out a wee bit.

I think that one of the big reasons why I haven't gone to see her is that I'm afraid. A chicken-shit, if you may. What else does she know about me? Does she know all my secrets, all the bad things I have said and done? Will she bring up such things in the reading, reminding me of what a horrible human being I have been at times? What if she doesn't see a light at the end of my tunnel? What if she tells me things that I already know, and doesn't give me any hope for the future?

I know, I know, that all sounds ridiculous. But really, having a glimpse into my future, is a bit scary to me. Maybe because at the moment, OK, let's be honest, for a long time now, I have had no hopes, no dreams, no goals. I live life as it comes, and have never really thought of a goal I would like to achieve in a very long time. I can't see where I'm heading in life, so I have a hard time believing that she does. And what if I don't like what she has to say?

But, I think that I will go see her soon. Why not? Might as well bite the bullet, and see what she has to say. It can't do any real harm, right?

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