Mar 25, 2010

Phone Conversation

So, my dad called me last night. In a dream of course. I haven't dreamt about him in a couple years, and if I remember correctly, I was just as mentally unstable and stressed at that point in time, as I am right now.

I dreamed that he had called me, and woke me up. I told him I missed him, and loved him, and he should really call more often, as I don't have any way to get ahold of him. He told me he had been busy golfing and visiting people, and knew that I was busy too. I told him all my current woes, all the things I just don't want to talk to anybody in real life about. I got a ton of shit off my chest.

He reminded me that I can fix anything, and everything will work out in the end, if I just quit the pity party, and figure out what I need to do. He told me not to forget about the things I want to do, and to find the time to do them, and not to worry about all the things that other people want me to do,like have kids, buy a house, etc. , because I shouldn't have to change my lifestyle just to make someone else happy. He said that if I don't watch out, life will get boring and monotonous, and he didn't want that for me. He reminded me that risk taking is a part of who I am, and even when it doesn't work out, I am happier for at least trying.

After all the serious talk, I told him about my dogs, and Smyrish and how I'm going to visit mom next month, and how I can't wait for summer to get here, so we can camp and go to festivals and such. He told me he had a lot of fun things planned too.

He ended our conversation very abruptly at that point and said he had to go, as he normally would, and left me yelling into a dial tone, asking when he was going to call me next.


Schmutzie said...

This seriously just made me cry.

dk said...

He'll call you when you need him. But you know he's always there right? You know that blur of something you just about saw from the corner of your eye, that's him peeking out of your heart.

i am the diva said...

heart you.
that was amazing,