1. Good-bye kisses when I leave for work, and the fact that when I just say "More!", I get more kisses. I could do it a bazillion times over, and get a kiss every time.
2. Getting to use work time, to visit friends and family ....and having them be super friendly and comfortable with my buddy from the group home....even when she yelled out "Abigail, I wiped my bum in the bathroom!" really loudly so everyone could hear. :)
3. Smyrish said he liked my hair. That compliment made my day, even though I didn't really show it at the time. I was hoping that he did.
4. Having a banker help me find money, instead of just taking it away.
5. Owning proper mannequins to display clothes on for the summer festivals.
6. Although the thunderstorm I was excited about this afternoon was sub-par, at least it didn't snow.
Showing posts with label work. Show all posts
Showing posts with label work. Show all posts
May 6, 2009
Oct 24, 2007
Burned the Fuck Out.
I really, really need a break from the group home. I realized this tonight, when I couldn't bring myself to even give a little bit of a shit when the residents were upset about valid things that would make anybody upset, and the thought of going in again tomorrow, made me want to weep all over the place.
I have been working at the same place, off and on, for eight years. Eight freaking YEARS. Most of the people in my life as of now, who I consider my closest confidants, I have know for less than five. I have only had one relationship in the past 10 years that lasted more than one. Which makes that a long fucking time in the world of Abigail.
I burn out like this at least once a year, and it is usually in the Fall or the Spring. Over the years, I have learned how not to let it affect my personal life in any way, and I leave my work at work. When my shift is over, I hop in the car, light a cigarette, and crank up some sort of angsty music that will help me clear my head before I return home. I walk in the door, pour myself a glass of something alcoholic, and retreat to my bedroom. When I am not burned out, that's all I need. Today, that didn't work. Maybe because the gas gauge was beeping at me to fill it, and I knew I couldn't, because for some reason I didn't get paid today, which is payday. Or maybe because, I know I need a holiday, but until I can be sure that the group home will be fine without me, I can't bring myself to take the time off.
About a week ago, while I was talking to my boss, she brought up the fact that I have never taken a holiday. I reminded her, that I take off at least once a year to somewhere for a couple weeks. She reminded me, that those 'holidays' don't count as holidays, because all I did was cover my shifts, and I never used my holiday pay. Apparently, I have a shitload of money accrued, and I have about 4-5 weeks I can use up.
The thing is, and I didn't want to tell her, is that I know that. I have been waiting for something big to happen, something that I want to save for, and take off to, and maybe never come back if it works out. I want to save that money, and those days, for something real special. I want to book my holidays, take my money, and then call and give them two weeks notice, while I'm gallivanting around Paris, or Peru or Mexico or Thailand.
However, the more overtime I work, the more autism I deal with, the more responsibility that is laid upon me....well, I have to wonder if using up a few of those days wouldn't be such a bad idea. I have nowhere to go right now, but maybe even a few days at home, catching up on day to day things might not be that bad. Hell, I could drink coffee all day, and read a book. I could finish my contract sewing. I could finally return all the phone calls and emails I've missed over the past few months. Maybe I could figure out another way to make money, that didn't deal with the handicapped...not that I have the skills to do anything other than this.
Don't get me wrong. I love my job. If I didn't, I wouldn't have stuck around this long. But I'm starting to think, that maybe I am just not the right person for this job anymore. Or maybe, I just need a break. I guess we'll just have to wait and see.
I have been working at the same place, off and on, for eight years. Eight freaking YEARS. Most of the people in my life as of now, who I consider my closest confidants, I have know for less than five. I have only had one relationship in the past 10 years that lasted more than one. Which makes that a long fucking time in the world of Abigail.
I burn out like this at least once a year, and it is usually in the Fall or the Spring. Over the years, I have learned how not to let it affect my personal life in any way, and I leave my work at work. When my shift is over, I hop in the car, light a cigarette, and crank up some sort of angsty music that will help me clear my head before I return home. I walk in the door, pour myself a glass of something alcoholic, and retreat to my bedroom. When I am not burned out, that's all I need. Today, that didn't work. Maybe because the gas gauge was beeping at me to fill it, and I knew I couldn't, because for some reason I didn't get paid today, which is payday. Or maybe because, I know I need a holiday, but until I can be sure that the group home will be fine without me, I can't bring myself to take the time off.
About a week ago, while I was talking to my boss, she brought up the fact that I have never taken a holiday. I reminded her, that I take off at least once a year to somewhere for a couple weeks. She reminded me, that those 'holidays' don't count as holidays, because all I did was cover my shifts, and I never used my holiday pay. Apparently, I have a shitload of money accrued, and I have about 4-5 weeks I can use up.
The thing is, and I didn't want to tell her, is that I know that. I have been waiting for something big to happen, something that I want to save for, and take off to, and maybe never come back if it works out. I want to save that money, and those days, for something real special. I want to book my holidays, take my money, and then call and give them two weeks notice, while I'm gallivanting around Paris, or Peru or Mexico or Thailand.
However, the more overtime I work, the more autism I deal with, the more responsibility that is laid upon me....well, I have to wonder if using up a few of those days wouldn't be such a bad idea. I have nowhere to go right now, but maybe even a few days at home, catching up on day to day things might not be that bad. Hell, I could drink coffee all day, and read a book. I could finish my contract sewing. I could finally return all the phone calls and emails I've missed over the past few months. Maybe I could figure out another way to make money, that didn't deal with the handicapped...not that I have the skills to do anything other than this.
Don't get me wrong. I love my job. If I didn't, I wouldn't have stuck around this long. But I'm starting to think, that maybe I am just not the right person for this job anymore. Or maybe, I just need a break. I guess we'll just have to wait and see.
Oct 6, 2007
Right on the Money Horoscope.
Abigail's Horoscope for October 6, 2007: It's going to be hard to get much work done today, thanks to a bunch of freaky interruptions that seem to come from out of nowhere. You'll end up doing fine in the long run, though it may be exasperating.
No shit. I work at a group home. Every time I sit down to do anything, especially if it's paper work, working with numbers and money, or at the computer, I'm guaranteed to have someone interrupt me. Usually, they do need assistance, but sometimes, they just want to throw their shirt at my head, ask me the same question they've asked me 45 times already, or steal my coffee and dump it down the sink.
So yes, this horoscope was right on target. I tried my darnedest today, but I am still weeks behind on my mountain of paperwork.
At least, The Cookster has offered to buy me a couple pints tonight, so I should be fine in the long run.
Apparently, my slow decent into alcoholism can't even be slowed down by an empty bank account.
No shit. I work at a group home. Every time I sit down to do anything, especially if it's paper work, working with numbers and money, or at the computer, I'm guaranteed to have someone interrupt me. Usually, they do need assistance, but sometimes, they just want to throw their shirt at my head, ask me the same question they've asked me 45 times already, or steal my coffee and dump it down the sink.
So yes, this horoscope was right on target. I tried my darnedest today, but I am still weeks behind on my mountain of paperwork.
At least, The Cookster has offered to buy me a couple pints tonight, so I should be fine in the long run.
Apparently, my slow decent into alcoholism can't even be slowed down by an empty bank account.
Sep 17, 2007
Day Sleeper.
Hmmm..it's 4:37 pm. I should still be sleeping, instead of sitting here occasionally listening in on The Cosby Show, and drinking this re-heated-twice-now coffee.
I worked a night shift last night, for the first time in a long time. For a long time, I worked the twelve to eights at the group home. Started out on a rotation, and did them 3 days a week for a few years, then it got too hard for my body to do 3 nights/3 evenings/3 days and I requested to do Monday to Friday graveyard shift, which I did for about a year.
It was heavenly. I have always been a night owl, and although I am the uber-social butterfly, I truly enjoyed the solitude of the night shift. I liked having nobody around that I needed to make small talk with, and I truly enjoyed just being on my own, to do my job in my own way.
I feel most creative in the wee hours of the morning, when nobody is around to distract me. In my year of doing strictly night shifts, I would arrive at work, get all the work done I was being paid to do, and then sit down, and do my own work, before it was time to wake up the ladies. I would bring my jewellery and sewing supplies and spend the nights creating for festivals, or I would sit at the computer or on the deck, and write to my heart's content. It was always so peaceful.
Eventually, it got to be a bit much. Summer hit, and I found that I wasn't sleeping when I got home, like I did in the winter. I wanted to be awake, to be out and about in the sunshine with the night sleepers. I would go two days without sleep, quite regularly just so I wouldn't miss out on any fun. I made a decision to quit my position, and go back to my old day job, and be like regular people.
Day shift, was not my thing. I had forgotten how much I hate mornings, especially in the winter. Getting up an hour early, just to scrape the windshield and warm up the car before I could head off to work, was hellish. It was strange to feel exhausted by ten o'clock at night, and I missed the days when I was able to stay up late.
When this supervisory position came up at the group home, I just had to jump on it. The hours I worked in a week allowed me to sleep in if need be, and stay up late if I wanted. Evenings, are definitely where I belong. And sometimes, I am lucky enough to be able to cover some night shifts for my staff, like I am doing this week, and it feels like I am getting a bit of a break.
Last night, was fun. I didn't realize how much I needed last night, until this morning, when I finally trudged home at 11:00am. I needed some alone time, to think, to get myself organized, to take in the past few days of being a busy little bee who took a very spontaneous trip to Toon Town, followed by a night of drinking on the patio, followed by a day of preparing to host a dinner party, followed by a day of brunch and feeding geese in the park.
However, I have to be back there tonight, and with only three hours of sleep under my belt, tonight might not be as wonderful. I forgot how hard it was to sleep all day, when it is so darn nice outside. Hopefully, after a nice dinner, I will be able to catch a few more winks, so I can enjoy another night of paid solitude.
I worked a night shift last night, for the first time in a long time. For a long time, I worked the twelve to eights at the group home. Started out on a rotation, and did them 3 days a week for a few years, then it got too hard for my body to do 3 nights/3 evenings/3 days and I requested to do Monday to Friday graveyard shift, which I did for about a year.
It was heavenly. I have always been a night owl, and although I am the uber-social butterfly, I truly enjoyed the solitude of the night shift. I liked having nobody around that I needed to make small talk with, and I truly enjoyed just being on my own, to do my job in my own way.
I feel most creative in the wee hours of the morning, when nobody is around to distract me. In my year of doing strictly night shifts, I would arrive at work, get all the work done I was being paid to do, and then sit down, and do my own work, before it was time to wake up the ladies. I would bring my jewellery and sewing supplies and spend the nights creating for festivals, or I would sit at the computer or on the deck, and write to my heart's content. It was always so peaceful.
Eventually, it got to be a bit much. Summer hit, and I found that I wasn't sleeping when I got home, like I did in the winter. I wanted to be awake, to be out and about in the sunshine with the night sleepers. I would go two days without sleep, quite regularly just so I wouldn't miss out on any fun. I made a decision to quit my position, and go back to my old day job, and be like regular people.
Day shift, was not my thing. I had forgotten how much I hate mornings, especially in the winter. Getting up an hour early, just to scrape the windshield and warm up the car before I could head off to work, was hellish. It was strange to feel exhausted by ten o'clock at night, and I missed the days when I was able to stay up late.
When this supervisory position came up at the group home, I just had to jump on it. The hours I worked in a week allowed me to sleep in if need be, and stay up late if I wanted. Evenings, are definitely where I belong. And sometimes, I am lucky enough to be able to cover some night shifts for my staff, like I am doing this week, and it feels like I am getting a bit of a break.
Last night, was fun. I didn't realize how much I needed last night, until this morning, when I finally trudged home at 11:00am. I needed some alone time, to think, to get myself organized, to take in the past few days of being a busy little bee who took a very spontaneous trip to Toon Town, followed by a night of drinking on the patio, followed by a day of preparing to host a dinner party, followed by a day of brunch and feeding geese in the park.
However, I have to be back there tonight, and with only three hours of sleep under my belt, tonight might not be as wonderful. I forgot how hard it was to sleep all day, when it is so darn nice outside. Hopefully, after a nice dinner, I will be able to catch a few more winks, so I can enjoy another night of paid solitude.
Jun 11, 2007
One Night in Wilkie
I spent last night and today in the bustling metropolis of Wilkie, Saskatchewan.
A co-worker and I signed up for a one day workshop that was being hosted there on the topic of Sensory Processing Disorder, in the hopes that we would be given some new ideas and information to bring back to the agency, and to help some of our residents. It was a great workshop, and I got what I wanted from it.
But the one thing that was worth the almost 5 hour drive, was walking into our motel room and seeing the sign posted at left. Being a smoker, I immediately looked to see if it was a smoking room. Of course, it wasn't, but I laughed, no I howled with laughter, when I saw this sign. What kind of people stay in this small town motel room? What has happened in here in the past, that they were forced to post this sign? What exactly is "etc.", and were we in danger of getting caught smoking it?
Although we weren't planning on smoking any contraband in our motel room, we were hoping we could go and rock out at the small town bar, but being quite late on Sunday night when we arrived, we were out of luck, and just hung out at the motel, and were good little girls, who don't go out and get drunk before an important conference that was being paid for by our agency. Yep, that had to be a first for me.
But, it was a good time all around. I needed a good road trip, full of AC/DC and Guns 'n' Roses blasting from the rental car stereo, and it was good to get away from The City, and hit the highway, if only for a day.
I just wanted to keep on driving all the way to my own small town, on the other side of the province from where we were, and stay there and wait for my friends to meet me in a couple weeks out at the lake for the camping. Maybe I should have.
May 25, 2007
The Weekend Has Arrived......
I can't believe it's Friday already. This week really has flown by. I haven't had a week that flew by in well, I can't remember when. This most likely has to do with how busy I was this week. For someone who only worked 2 days this week at her 'day' job, I sure have been a busy bee, getting ready for this festival.
So, I am relishing this last hour of relaxation I have today. I am going to drink coffee, and watch Law & Order. Once it is over, I have to hop in the shower, pack up my car, and get my butt over to Knuckle Toes' place, so we can spend the afternoon running around picking up mannequins, bank floats, shower curtains, business cards, and all the other last minute goodies we need for tomorrow.
Although it's been a busy week, it hasn't been bad in any way. Sure, I woke up this morning with something that is hopefully not pink eye, and I haven't had time to sleep for more than 4 hours a night, but other than that, it's been A-OK. I did a happy dance when I saw my bank account on payday (unlike last payday, when I called my boss and told her I thought they had made a mistake with the direct deposit!). I'm ecstatic that I now have enough money to buy a new camera, and a new stereo and back seat for my car! Work was super productive this week, and I think I am falling into place as the big boss lady quite nicely. I realized that every single guy that works in my field, is H-O-T, and had the pleasure of meeting a whole shwack of them over the past couple days. My brother the JukeBox Hero, has gotten the Canada Day camping trip plans under-way, and although we don't get what we want this year, he has been patient with me in making other plans, and I am confident that it will all work out. After this festival is over, my priority will be getting the camping trip plans finalized, and tracking down the elusive filmmaker that has my tent. Yay, camping!
And on that note, I need to get my butt in gear, and get this day over with, so I can sit and relax some more, on a hopefully sunny patio, with the ladies and enjoy and beer or two.
So, I am relishing this last hour of relaxation I have today. I am going to drink coffee, and watch Law & Order. Once it is over, I have to hop in the shower, pack up my car, and get my butt over to Knuckle Toes' place, so we can spend the afternoon running around picking up mannequins, bank floats, shower curtains, business cards, and all the other last minute goodies we need for tomorrow.
Although it's been a busy week, it hasn't been bad in any way. Sure, I woke up this morning with something that is hopefully not pink eye, and I haven't had time to sleep for more than 4 hours a night, but other than that, it's been A-OK. I did a happy dance when I saw my bank account on payday (unlike last payday, when I called my boss and told her I thought they had made a mistake with the direct deposit!). I'm ecstatic that I now have enough money to buy a new camera, and a new stereo and back seat for my car! Work was super productive this week, and I think I am falling into place as the big boss lady quite nicely. I realized that every single guy that works in my field, is H-O-T, and had the pleasure of meeting a whole shwack of them over the past couple days. My brother the JukeBox Hero, has gotten the Canada Day camping trip plans under-way, and although we don't get what we want this year, he has been patient with me in making other plans, and I am confident that it will all work out. After this festival is over, my priority will be getting the camping trip plans finalized, and tracking down the elusive filmmaker that has my tent. Yay, camping!
And on that note, I need to get my butt in gear, and get this day over with, so I can sit and relax some more, on a hopefully sunny patio, with the ladies and enjoy and beer or two.
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